[/caption]I must admit. I feel a little sad. For the first time ever, I had to buy formula today. Some of you may think my feelings are a bit strange, but for a mommy that's only nursed, I felt quite strange standing in the formula aisle at Target! But I realized something while standing there for 10 minutes at least, gazing at the hundreds of different kinds of formula they sell (ok, maybe not hundreds, but it is an overwhelming amount!) I am a bit prideful about my nursing capabilities. Now that I'm seeming to be a bit incapable of supplying my daughter's needs (only at night), I realize that I've taken pride over the years in the fact that I can nurse while other moms give up or are unable to. I felt guilty standing in that aisle buying formula. I wanted to tell the other mom standing on the same aisle (but turned the opposite direction searching for something to do with breastfeeding) that I really breastfeed to, that I was only having to buy formula to feed my baby at night. Because in the back of my mind, I wondered if maybe she saw me standing there, reading all the formula labels, trying to find the right one for my child, and thought, "Oh, that poor mom. If only she knew how wonderful nursing is!" "I do know! It is great! But not when your child is unable to sleep through the night any longer because your milk isn't satisfying her at night for some reason!" How silly of me?! That woman probably did not even notice me standing there! She was in her own little world, cooing to her infant, while searching for breast shields or milk bags! That is when I realized that I am prideful, and I have been wrong and sinful for EVER looking down on any other mother for not breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is best for your baby. But it definitely is not the only way. And a breastfeeding mom is definitely no better than one that bottle feeds. Oh, the silly (and absurd) thoughts that pride places in your mind...
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